My First Cold Call

Courtesy of UGA

One Saturday morning, I was driving around Athens, Georgia. I was behind the wheel of my trusty hand me down 1984 Pontiac Bonneville. My mind wandered thinking about my plans for…a wedding engagement.

Karen was the girl of my dreams; smart, breathtakingly beautiful and she laughed at my jokes. Really the perfect combination. She is the smartest woman I had ever met except that she would hopefully marry me.

The question of "how" occupied my thoughts for days. As you can imagine, I wanted it to be special and memorable, but also not a copycat kind of approach. And in the dark days before YouTube, Twitter and Facebook, ideas were a lot harder to come by.

Athens is home to the University of Georgia and the Bulldogs. Karen and I were both in the Redcoat Band; she in the flag line and I was a brass player. We loved everything about the Redcoats and Georgia Football.

Football in the south is nearly a religion and the spiritual leader is the head coach. In those days, the great Vince Dooley had the helm. He now has the field at the stadium named after him.

My Bonneville happened to take me by Coach Dooley's house (everyone in town knew where he lived). I slowed a little to look up the hill at the Coach's impressive looking estate. Then a flash popped into my mind with searing clarity...what if I could ask Karen the big question on the 50-yard line of the UGA football stadium? THAT, would be the ticket!

I kept driving past the Dooley’s and soon pulled into the parking lot of a nearby strip mall. My mind raced with thoughts about Karen. My breathing started to get elevated and my palms a little moist as I realized what I must do. I had to knock on Coach Vince Dooley's door and ask for his help.

I was going to make my first cold call.

Vince Dooley was a man I had never met in person and to say that he was a hero in the State of Georgia is an understatement. I might as well be knocking on the front door of the White House. The stakes were huge, and I had no backup plan.

I summoned all the courage I could muster and put the car in gear. I pointed the Bonneville back towards the Dooley estate and soon pulled into the driveway and walked up to the door. My heart was beating quickly as I rang the doorbell.

Coach Dooley's wife Barbara answered. She was famous too and almost as widely known as the Coach. She looked at me with some suspicion; a lanky college kid likely up to no good. "Can I help you?," she said. "Mam, can I please speak with the Coach?" I muttered. She paused, and after a moment of evaluating the situation opened the door. "Come on in." She said skeptically.

Just like that, I was walking down the hall of Coach Dooley's home. From idea to reality in 15 minutes.

I remember every detail of the walk in the house. The walls were lined with pictures of the Dooley’s with all manner of major celebrities. The walls were half beadboard and the floors hardwood. Finally, we reached the den where the great man was sitting. Coach Dooley was wearing Khaki pants and a white tee shirt and sitting in an easy chair. He was, of course, watching a ball game with reading glasses on his forehead.

After a short intro from his wife, the Coach looked at me and said, "Son, how can I help you?" I managed to spit out, "Coach, can I borrow the stadium?"

He looked a little puzzled, made a funny face and said, "You're gonna have to tell me a little more than that." I smiled a slightly embarrassed and nervous smile and told him about Karen. We were both in the Redcoat band, I explained. I am second generation UGA and had attended football games since I was 3 years old. We love the university and I love her…one big Bulldog love milkshake.

"So, let me get this straight, you want to use the football stadium to get engaged?"

"Uh, yes sir," I said. "Well, that's a first," said the Coach. He went on to say, rubbing his chin. Finally, he looked me right in the eyes and said "you can't do it during a game, of course, but I'll allow it when the venue is empty." I beamed.

He wrote down a number and said, "Call Tony on Monday and he will get things set up." I wanted to hug the man. He was very friendly and sympathetic but ready to get back to his Saturday. I thanked him profusely and retreated.

A Marriage Made In Between The Hedges

Tony was on top of it and soon we had a plan. I would take Karen to dinner the following week - on Sunday, May 12th, 1991. The University Police were tasked with unlocking the normally highly secured stadium. They would not only leave the gate "false locked" but turn off the fabled laser field alarms.

I met Karen for dinner at DePalmas Italian Cafe - it is still in business! Karen later said she could tell something was up because I didn't finish my meal.

 After dinner, I suggested a stroll through campus on a beautiful spring evening. We talked about how we met and how our relationship had grown. We talked about our hopes and our dreams. My stomach churned as we got closer to the hallowed hall of UGA football.

Finally, we made it to the stadium. I tried the gate and, well, it opened! Karen was horrified. My second major sales job was to convince my law-abiding girlfriend to break the law. Finally, after some cajoling, we walked in. The stadium was grand and magical at night. The stillness of the evening was a counterbalance to my beating heart.

As we made it to the field and those supposed alarms, I had to again convince her that we were OK. I grabbed both her hands and looked right into her eyes. "Do you trust me?" I said. She slowly nodded yes, and we stepped on the field.

I'll remember the next two minutes for the rest of my life. We strolled down the field and I wanted to clap my heals like a happy Irishman. As we approached the 50-yard line I spotted the goods. A single red rose with an engagement ring on it. The person who was to be my best man was part of the advance team that placed the set up ahead of our arrival.

"Well, what is this? " I asked Karen. She spotted the items and quickly processed the situation. A tear formed in her eye. I knelt on one knee and asked for her hand in marriage.

 "YES!" she said, and the deal was sealed. My world was rocked, and I felt at the same time great relief and tremendous excitement.

And then we heard a ROAR. A number of our friends who were previously snuck in and hidden in the upper deck of the stadium jumped up like cheerleaders after a big play. I felt like spiking the ball and yelling, "Touchdown!"

Now, four wonderful kids and nearly 28 years later I think of this special few days with warm remembrance. Life has been kind to Karen and me and all these years later we still love each other very much. We’ve lived a wonderful life together and have some quarters yet to go.

But I'm also reminded that taking measured risk - social and otherwise can pay big dividends. Forcing yourself to deal with stretching your comfort zone can open new doors in life. Crossing the threshold of the Dooley household was temporarily discomforting, but ultimately life changing in multiple ways.

Sometimes young people in my business ask, "Does cold calling still work?  

My friends, a wonderful marriage, four kids and two pugs are all living proof that the answer is YES!